I don't know what I did to deserve friends like this

S-Want me to stop being a distraction?
M-Please don’t.
S-As you wish my love, so seriously I know that feeling useless when your friends need help is soul destroying. You doing okay with that?
M-It’s pretty rough, Trying to keep a lot of people afloat right now and I don’t always know how.
S-Well, with my vast life experience(since I’m fucking old), what everyone tells me (and I ignore) is to ensure you are able to swim before you help.
M-I was but you get tired sometimes. Swimming is hard work
S-It’s a bitch. Have you tried flippers?
M-Do you have some I could borrow??
S-Yep! Babycakes, I’m your flippers!!!
M-I think that may be the sweetest thing you’ve ever said. Possibly ever.
S-Well I do love you.
M-I love you too :)
S-Oh love, by the way, don’t worry about me sinking....I’m scuba certified.
M-There are no oceans in Austria!
S-It’s cool, no worries darling...I’ll just flop around till you laugh your worries away.
M-How did this just become the perfect metaphor for our friendship?
S-Because I’m amazing...but you’re better.
M-A good team?
S-Yessir, at your command.
M-I’m not a sir. Good thing you didn’t join the military...

dreams and dreams and dreams

I dreamt about you again last night. It is only the second time since it's happened. It's weird. I thought I'd dream about you all the time, try to bring you back. That's usually what happens when I feel like my heart is breaking. I don't really want to know why it's different this time. This time I saw you at church. People were trying to talk to me and I just kept telling them to shut up because all I wanted to do was drink in your face to make sure you were real. But I was scared. I knew it couldn't last. But still the only thing in my mind for a few moments was your face. And I could see it clearly.

Remember how we first saw each other after our time apart? We both went to mass at Resurrection (CAAA-RISSS!) and we hugged but since mass was starting all we could do was smile like fools. I remember I couldn't stop my feet from moving. I remember the light especially. Will we get that again? But better this time? Please say yes.

I listened to the recordings by the campfire tonight for the first time in months. Your voice was so sweet it was painful. It was at once so beautiful and familiar, but then to know that I will never know it again was the worst agony.

I would give anything, absolutely anything, for one more conversation with you.

My love, my love.