comfortable

I've never been this comfortable before.

I'm so relaxed all the time, it's nice. No gimmicks, no hidden tensions, no doubts. Just fun.




Dance this weekend! I still need a dress! Hopefully the trip to Hawthorne with Mia works out and then I can get something for the Great Gatsby party as well! Hooray!

Letter From A Birmingham Jail

"Such an attitude stems from a tragic misconception of time, from the strangely irrational notion that there is something in the very flow of time that will inevitably cure all ills. Actually, time itself is neutral; it can be used either destructively or constructively. More and more I feel that the people of ill will have used time much more effectively than have the people of good will. We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the hateful words and actions of the bad people but for the appalling silence of the good people. Human progress never rolls in on wheels of inevitability; it comes through the tireless efforts of men willing to be co workers with God, and without this hard work, time itself becomes an ally of the forces of social stagnation. We must use time creatively, in the knowledge that the time is always ripe to do right. "
-MLK

All over now.

"its not my job to care.
where did you serve?
who did you feed?
who slept better that night?
and did you stop human trafficking?
who did you release from slavery?"


Never more. I discovered this weekend how much I'd been missing out on. Just how unhealthy my life used to be. Ironic that both worlds collided in the single weekend, but it's just making my new experiences strong in relief. It's unreal. But so amazing.

Addicted

"you should be wilder; you're no fun at all. yeah thanks for the input, thanks for the call.."

"it's this thing now, it's drivin' me wild. i gotta see what's up before it gets me down. love's not a mystery, it's everything."

"we tour this world like we were on a bus, but i can't help but wonder who'll back down first, the world or us...she's harder to read with each page of the book."


So excited for Avatar with Aiden, Annie and Wyatt tonight.

Live my life

Today, I will not babysit the immature. Today, I will not be pulled down by my past. Today, I will not be a slave to irony and doubt. Maybe tomorrow, maybe someday. But today, I will live for what's good for me. And what's good for me is right here, right now.

the touch of you lips is a shock not a kiss, it's electric twist

I forgot how this feels.

I forgot how scary it is. But how exhilarating.


BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. So much going on. College is constant change. I love it.

EEEEEEEEEEEK!

WOW! This semester has already got me running around non-stop! I've barely had time to breathe! Not only was I figuring out all my classes but my Border Plunge and Study Abroad stuff. So it turns out that Fr. Art didn't get the original email I sent on Christmas so he filled London Spring. So I put down my deposit for Salzburg. Not ideal considering recent events but everyone I've talked has not a single bad thing to say. As Eleanor put it, "It's not the people in Salzburg who are missing out on their sophomore year at UP, it's us who are missing out on the Salzburg year. I look at the stuff they're doing and I just want to cry." So that will be awesome.

I haven't even had time to put my binders together and I'm usually WAY anal about that. Marketing is going well. The teacher is a self-proclaimed jerk who only gives one A a semester. He reminds me of Mathews in that he's very brisk and blunt and will shoot you down mercilessly if you're wrong. So that already had me WAY fired up after the first class because I like a challenge. And I apparently respond well to that kind of teaching.

This weekend Maya and I drove 9 hours each way up to Schweitzer with Lindsey so she could work and not have to drive alone. It was a lot of fun. I've always loved road trips and we got to sled and hot tub and have some good talks that thankfully prepared me for the drama of yesterday.

Yesterday was very interesting. I'm glad that it went down the way it did. He really gets me. I just hope this all works out and the drama stays to a minimum. It's really hard to make myself hold back and remember that it's definitely not as straightforward as it feels. But for now, it feels good. Things haven't felt this good in a long time. I'm so excited :)